


Sometimes good things happen when Tony is bored.

by shadowsiren5



Series: The Sorting Series [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-17
Updated: 2014-03-17
Packaged: 2018-01-16 00:56:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1325749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowsiren5/pseuds/shadowsiren5
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pepper wouldn't let Tony get drunk, so he found something  else to do after he got bored.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sometimes good things happen when Tony is bored.

**Author's Note:**

> icefallstears is the beta who worked through this with me even though she was dealing with health issues. So a big thank you to her.  
> I don't own anything, just borrowed for entertainment purposes. Aslo I didn't expect the whole pairing thing. I wrote this on the fly after a request because of the other story Rodney's Private Project. I need to give credit to the following people for letting me bounce ideas and ask questions. Alainia, Amanda, Ahaira, Beverlyannpatty, Cpringle, Kalya, and Rebelkitty84. Thank you guys for your help. I met these get people on http://keiramarcos.com/. Keira is a great writer with fantastic minions. Read her work.

Tony Stark muttered as he worked on the computer in front of him. He had been bored and had come across a website and had figured why the hell not. He couldn't get drunk because Pepper had said she would castrate him since he had meetings all day. He still couldn't figure out why he had to be there for them, after all, he paid Pepper to do that kind of stuff. He sniffed and went back to work as he waited for Pepper to pick him up just to be sure he actually arrived for the meetings. 

“Let’s see how Cap does on this little test. What would that stick up his ass rate?” Tony grunted as he typed and clicked away. 

Tony sat back and frowned, “Huh...well that figures, of course he would be a Hufflepuff. Mister I am a goody two shoe. Blah, blah blah.”

He sat forward and started typing again and muttered, “Alright Bruce, let’s see what happens with you and your anger management issues on here.”

Loki arched a brow as he watched Stark mutter to himself. Perhaps the man had finally passed the point of no return. He had come here to taunt Stark and perhaps pick a fight. He looked at the windowwith longing and considered just throwing him out it again but put that to the side for a moment. He was rather curious about what the man was doing to have not noticed that Loki was in the room. He also found it curious that his computer, Jarvis, had not alerted the man.

Loki stepped forward to peer over the mortal’s shoulder and watched as he clicked various answers to what appeared to be questions. He stepped back when Stark straightened and spoke.

“Hah! I knew it! Ravenclaw, you bastard. I knew that’s where you would go,” Tony crowed as he stretched his arms.

Loki finally asked, “Stark what are you doing?” He watched as the mortal fell off the chair. He made an attractive sight sprawled out on the floor at Loki's feet.

Tony hit the ground with a thump. “Damn that hurt.” He looked up and froze as he realized exactly who had scared the hell out of him.

Loki grinned and conjured a chair next to Stark's and raised a brow. “Well I am waiting for an answer and if I don't get one quickly, I can always throw you out the window again.”

Tony rubbed the back of his head and eyed Loki, “Jarvis, buddy, want to tell me why you didn't let me know that Loki was here.”

“My apologies, Sir, but you gave me orders not to disturb you unless the planet was under attack or someone was actually trying to kill you. Since Loki was not attacking and merely observing you, I followed your orders,” Jarvis replied.

Tony snorted and looked at the ceiling, “Why did I build a smart ass A.I. again?”

Jarvis answered, “Because you were bored and wished to see if you could sir.”

Tony nodded, “Good answer.”

He turned back to Loki, “To answer your question Loki, I am seeing what houses the Avengers would be sorted into.”

Loki tilted his head a little, “Sorted? What do you mean by this and is there a point?”

Tony eyed the god for a minute and shrugged before picking up his chair and sitting next to Loki. “There is a set of movies based on this kid named Harry Potter and in the first movie he had to get sorted at this magic school he attended called Hogwarts. There are four houses: Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin. Each house has certain characteristics. Gryffindor is for the brave and adventurous, Hufflepuff for the loyal and hardworking, Ravenclaw for the intelligent and wise, and Slytherin for the cunning and ambitious.”

Loki nodded, “I see. Who have you sorted already Stark?”

Tony grinned, “Well Cap got in Hufflepuff the bastard, and Bruce got Ravenclaw. I haven't done the others yet. Want to stick around and see what happens?”

Loki studied the mortal for a moment and came to a conclusion, “Stark you do realize I tried to take this planet and kill you by throwing you out a window. You are quite mad.”

Tony grinned, “Takes one to know one Reindeer Games. So you in or what?

“Very well Stark, proceed to the next sorting. You will do Thor and see where the buffoon ends up, though I can take a guess.” Loki was admittedly amused by Stark.

Tony grinned and started typing, “So Loki what made you drop by. Don't get me wrong I really like the fact you haven't tried to throw me out a window but you got to admit this is kinda random.”

Loki nodded, “In truth Stark, I was rather bored and decided to pick a fight. This, however, will do for now. Though, I make no guarantees about the window.”

Tony shrugged as he waited for the computer to finish, “Fair enough. I was bored myself and since Pepper threatened to castrate me if I got drunk; I figured why not do this.”

Loki winced, “That was wise of you Stark; even I admit that woman is formidable.”

“Oh man that is so predictable, if you guessed Thor was a Gryffindor then you were right.” Tony laughed as he read the description under the Gryffindor banner. 

Loki rolled his eyes, “Of course the idiot would enter that house. He knows no other way.”

Tony nodded, “Agreed the guy can be really gullible and let’s not get into what he did to the poor microwave. I have had to replace it five times now because he keeps blowing them up. He is still a good man to have your back in a fight though.”

Loki hummed but said nothing, “Do Barton next, I wish to see where he would go. While the man is brave, there are levels to him that making it interesting to see where he would be placed.”

 

Tony started the test over and got to work. He had to admit when Loki wasn't being crazy as hell he was actually good company. That thought disturbed him a little. What did it say about him that he enjoyed the company of a crazy sneaky god. Yeah maybe he shouldn't go there. Yet...

Loki studied Stark as he worked at the computer and found himself rather pleased with the mortal. It was unexpected but he had always enjoyed chaos and Stark created a great deal of chaos and confusion. This situation was a good example. Instead of attacking when he realized Loki was in the room with him, he had invited him to see where others would be sorted on the computer.

 

Tony leaned back in his seat and frowned, “Huh, it can’t sort Clint. It gives two choices for the guy, Slytherin and Gryffindor. Apparently the guy has depths and it helps that he's hot.”

Loki stared at Stark, “You enjoy the attentions of men Stark?”

Tony shrugged, “I am equal opportunity Loki. I like men and women even though its not widely known. I do like to keep some things private when I can.”

Loki put the thought to the side for a moment, “The Widow would be next I believe.”

Tony cocked a brow but said nothing as he started again. He found it interesting that Loki had nothing to say about his preferences. It didn't bother him though he had come to terms with what he wanted a long time ago.

Loki turned several possibilities over in his head as he plotted and planned. Perhaps there was another way to ease his boredom. He would see how things played out. Stark was attractive and intelligent. The mortal was well built and very solid. Loki found him very pleasing to look at.  
Tony started laughing, “Tash got sorted into Slytherin. That is so not a surprise.”

Loki snorted, “Indeed that woman is very cunning. I will admit it was impressive how she tried to get the information from me on your airship.”

Tony turned to look at Loki, “First of all not my airship. I could totally build something much better that what Shield has if I wanted to. Second, Tash totally had you; I saw your face as she walked away on the video feed. You were pissed.”

“I will admit I underestimated the Widow. I will not do so again,” Loki said with a frown. “Now I believe it is your turn Stark. Let us see where you shall be sorted.”

“Right let’s do this and see where my genius lands me,” Tony said in amusement.

Tony typed away and looked out the corner of his eye at Loki. The god was starting to distract him in a bad way. He wasn't sure what to do with the thoughts going through his head but there was no doubt they would get him into trouble of the best kind or thrown through a window. Again. Maybe he should get rid of the windows.

He had noticed Stark looking at him but pretended not to notice. Loki was very aware of the look he was getting and waved his hand discretely so that his magic made the light hit him a certain way. He hid his smirk as Stark—No Tony shifted. Oh yes, the mortal was attracted to him. It had been some time since Loki had had a lover.,. perhaps it was time to take another. Besides Tony was the best of the mortals on this world and Loki as a god deserved only the best.

Tony frowned as the computer screen went blank. “What the hell just happened?”

Loki leaned forward so that he brushed Tony's shoulder, “What’s the matter Tony, did you break your toy?

Tony jerked in surprise and looked at Loki, “Did you just use my first name?”

Loki smirked and leaned in until their noses were almost touching, “I did indeed Tony. You should always be on a first name basis with your lover.”

Loki leaned back and stood up before Tony could speak and walked to the middle of the room, “I will meet you here on Thursday at seven for dinner.”

Just before Loki could teleport away Tony called out, “Don’t you want to know where you would be sorted and where I am superposed to go?”

Loki laughed quietly, “It’s rather obvious, I would be a Slytherin, Tony and as for you, it’s obvious what happened to the machine. It couldn't sort you Tony Stark for many reasons, the most important being you have the qualities of all four houses. I never settle for less than the best, Anthony Edward Stark.”

 

Loki vanished leaving Tony to stare into space a little stunned and flattered. Then he grinned as he realized he had a date Thursday night. He owed Pepper a vacation and a bonus for not letting him get drunk today.


End file.
